What is it you've always wanted to do?
Why haven't you done it?
I will no longer make excuses for not living the life I want to live. This past year was an exercise in living.
Christmas came and went, it was different being away from family but...I truly enjoyed my day. It was a day of relaxation. A day of peace. I didn't spend a bunch of money on useless gifts. I didn't stress fixing the perfect Christmas dinner. I didn't stuff myself to the point of discomfort.
Instead we threw the frisbee and read on the beach. We ate delicious BBQ and we sat in the hot tub. Truly peaceful.
Sure, I missed family. But, I made a point to BE truly present all day. And it was bliss.
Every year, my mentors challenge me to choose a word for the year. My word for 2019 was BE. I wanted to just BE in the flow of life. I wanted to BE happy, to BE me, to BE present, to BE alive. I had no idea that would bring an end to a 20 year relationship that was killing me (I couldn't see that until I got away). I wasn't BEing ME for the majority of that relationship because I was afraid of his judgment...always afraid I wouldn't live up to expectations.
Never again will I change who I am to please anyone else. I am full of passion, full of love, full of adventure...I will BE me regardless of what anyone thinks.
Sure, I still catch myself in judgment of me... there's 41 years of that to break. But I will BE in the flow of life, living my truth, and LOVING COMPLETELY. This year was the first year of my life. Beginning with my soul journey in January to The Little Red Cabin in Garden Valley, I began to come back to me. I found my truth. I found my freedom.
Early 2019, I sat with one of my mentors, THE Frank White. He told me of his journey to finding the truth. I asked "what is that truth you found?"
He responded that he can't tell me what the truth is because it is different for each of us.
My truth is not your truth.
It is up to each of us to take the journey into self and discover what we came into this life to learn.
Yes, we have souls we have journeyed with ... but, even they will find a different answer.
So, I hope that 2020 will bring you your true vision (see what I did there 😜). May you discover self. May you discover truth. May you discover how to BE in the now.
Now is all we have. Now, I am going to hit the gym. This body has a lot of places to take me still... so I must keep it healthy.
The travel front has not brought much, but I've had a tremendous amount of time to think. And I am enjoying the now, no matter where I am, or what I'm doing. I am truly grateful for this moment.
Much love to you all! Have a beautiful day... just BE - even for a moment - BE in the NOW.
Sometimes I sit and look at the clouds, trying to see how to paint them in their full beauty. Stormy skies are easier than the dark clouds on brilliant blue sky. We've had cloudy and rainy weather... at least it's still warm-ish! And, we have a gym to work out in, so we're still getting some activity...but not much.
We must be getting used to the heat because 70° now feels chilly. We've been in Fort Myers for almost a month. The past week the weather has kept us inside - I'm getting work done - but it's hard to not miss the beach.
Especially since I finally got us a frisbee. Just in time for crappy weather.
The people here at the park are friendlier since I put up the Christmas lights. It's odd though, not having much social interaction. I do miss my weekly coffee group with fellow Unstoppable Influencers. I don't mind having so much quiet time but I know Jordan must be missing having human interaction (besides me...I'm not the greatest conversationalist). I try, but I'm perfectly ok with silence... most of the time.
It is what it is. We each have our own way of doing things. It is not your job to make anyone else happy - you can't. We each are responsible for ourselves - and nothing else.
Yesterday I read the 16th verse of the Tao Te Ching. Becoming empty is what happened to me over the past year, and I try to stay in this space... but I'm not perfect. Here's that verse...
"Become totally empty. Let your heart be at peace. Amidst the rush of worldly comings and goings, observe how endings become beginnings.
Things flourish, each by each, only to return to the Source... to what is and what is to be.
To return to the root is to find peace. To find peace is to fulfill one's destiny. To fulfill one's destiny is to be constant. To know the constant is called insight. Not knowing this cycle leads to eternal disaster.
Knowing the constant gives perspective. This perspective is impartial. Impartiality is the highest nobility; the highest nobility is Divine.
Being Divine, you will be at one with the Tao. Being at one with the Tao is eternal. This way is everlasting, not endangered by physical death." ~Lao-tzu, Tao Te Ching
We are all connected... can you feel it?
I hope you'll find the peace that's available for each of us. I'm going to finish a painting today, that's the plan anyway. 😁 Hope you all have a wonderful day!
70 days. It's been quite the experience living full time in a travel trailer. There's always something new to learn (for some reason the tanks are not emptying completely... that's the newest "lesson"). This life is wonderful, I wouldn't change a thing.
Today, I used the gym for the first time. It's nice to have equipment readily available... and it's rarely used so it's like having our own personal workout room.
In between painting and grading, we've been to the pool and the beach. I got a little sun, I'm not quite as pale as when we first arrived. 😁
The rain returned after two days of very warm weather. Which means I painted inside today. I'm back to working regularly again. Moving forward with plans to create the best year yet (and finish projects that have been waiting to be released).
I am finally getting my head wrapped around the fact that this really is my life now. Growing up on a farm, living in Idaho my entire life, I never imagined I'd be living wherever I park. I am so blessed to have this opportunity! And blessed to be able to stay connected... no matter where I am.
Through my business, in meetings and conversations, it keeps coming up that people are so overwhelmed right now... trying to make decisions, trying to come up with answers.
Trying. Trying. Trying. Searching for what's next instead of relaxing into the flow of what is.
Over and over again friends have said this. But they aren't doing anything to change it. Maybe because it is what they're used to. Because "being busy" - especially during the holidays - is what everyone is used to. But it doesn't have to be that way.
Are you enjoying the moment, or are you worried about the next thing you must do?
I ask you to take time to just BE. it's worth every minute, I promise. All the things will still be there. Your time with loved ones is what's most important. Your time to take care of yourself - do something you love. Go play in the rain, jump in a puddle, laugh, play, LIVE. Take the time to enjoy the company.
Take the time to BE. There's magic in the stillness.
Day 62 - 66
This week, I celebrated another birthday. We watched the sunset and had dinner on the beach one night, walked in the moonlight to end my actual birth day, and went to watch a up and coming band play the next day.
I painted, I graded, I organized, I got my health insurance figured out (yippee)... it was a week full of activities - the mundane and the exciting - in paradise.
This week made me realize how truly blessed this life is. I am blessed to share space with an amazing human. I am blessed to be working. I am blessed to have all my friends and family. I was blessed with all the kind birthday messages. I am blessed with talents that I can't fully understand.
I am truly grateful for the abundance I have in my life and am excited for more to come.
This will be my first Christmas away from my daughter, we shall see how I'm feeling as Christmas rolls through. Hopefully the weather will be nice here so we can spend Christmas day on the beach. That would be a lovely distraction.
It's been raining here off and on lately. It was definitely monsoon worthy on Thursday night, after the concert. We ran out of the club, spun around and got thoroughly soaked in the rain. It's a warm rain. It's quite nice.
When was the last time you enjoyed the feeling of rain hitting your skin?
Or really enjoyed the warmth of the sun?
It's the little things that can bring the greatest joy... if you'll let them.
There's more to life than an aquisition of things. So much more beyond the material. So much beyond what can be seen, or tasted, or smelled, or touched. So much more.
It's time to appreciate what you already have and get into the flow of the wonderful things that are in store.
Not sure who needed that message today... but there it is. Much love and light to you all!
It's time to do things differently.
Are you doing things over and over again, the way you've always done it, and expecting different results?
Are you TRYING to do things... or are you relaxing into the flow?
I know I've been doing the same old things. I've been trying to make dreams come true the last few months - I got out of the flow of my purpose. To make a difference in lives through my art, I must follow my heart.
And as Yoda said, "Do or do not, there is no try."
We each must take action toward what we want. It is through daily action, and commitment, that dreams become reality. Sheesh, look at where I am. This is all because I...
1. Made a decision to go for it;
2. Took massive action; and,
3. Trusted that all would work out for my good.
I released the fear and worry and turned it into excitement. There are limitless possibilities for me now. They are there for you as well.
Day 60 we spent some time on the beach, I began reading one of Jordan's books "Change your thoughts, change your life." I'm happy to say that most days, I live the concepts that I've read so far. I am enjoying the book, it's confirming what I already knew ... and reminding me of what I must do.
Fort Myers Beach is a fun place. Our campground managers aren't great at customer service, but other than that, we really like it here. We're close to the beach (so close Jordan walked there yesterday as I worked) and there's plenty to do.
After the beach, I programmed some marketing posts for the week. I know though, that I must do more than that. I am relaxing into the flow and open to the possibilities that will bring abundance quickly and easily into our lives.
Day 61 was spent working. Mondays I typically spend a good portion of the day on my teaching job. Their grading systems are ridiculously slow - so it often takes longer than I hoped. But, before that, I had a call with one of my coaches, Valerie Huylen, she's always a magician at telling me exactly what I need to hear. And, she reminds me that I have already done the hardest parts and already made amazing things happen. I am a manifesting giant.
After the call with her, Jordan and I were chatting about where we'll go after January 7th. We both would like to go to the keys but those places are typically booked at least a year in advance. I stated, out loud, that our perfect spot would open up for us to stay.
That afternoon, while he was at the beach, I started making calls. One refused us because they have a 2 pet minimum (I said, "well that's dumb, guess I will take my money elsewhere").
The next one I called (I was picking pretty randomly by human standards) just had a cancellation. But, had the 9th through the 15th is all. I took it. It's near Key West afterall. I called another - and they too had a cancellation. But, February 1st - 23rd.
I took it. Things just opened up for us. So exciting how that works!
Today I will find our perfect spot for the 15th-1st.
I am relaxing in the flow, but...I will do my part and take action. I am committed to seeing my dreams become reality. Not because I want fame and fortune (those will be bonuses) but because I can help so many people when I have a life of abundance.
Shoot, how many of YOU have been inspired by my actions already. I'm doing my part.
What is it you must do?
Today (day 62) calls for sunset on the beach... no idea what the rest of the day has in store (besides faculty meetings this evening 😑 Grateful that they are AFTER sunset). I hope you have a beautiful day! Love you all!
BTW, the image above is the sunset from outside my house. There've been some beautiful ones lately.
Miami was nice and warm. We were one day early, otherwise, I would have been able to go in to the Art Basel exhibit as well as two others that were doing their VIP day while we were there. I didn't want to abandon my travel mates - so I was unwilling to pay the VIP ticket price. That was an unfortunate turn of events. Oh well, guess I wasn't meant to see it. We enjoyed South Beach, just wandering about. I loved the architecture - we were hanging out in the Art Deco district so the buildings were very cool and the people were fun to watch. The water was so clear and blue. I did have a sea shell bash my foot, I still have a bruise from it. But, we had a great time. We even ate at the famous Mango's (there were no performances while we were there though - boo).
While there, I had a coaching call with one of my coaches. I really am motivated to do things differently from here on out. I'm beginning to find clarity in what I must do. What I've been doing isn't making me a ton of money - which limits the impact that I can make. So I am so ready for change. Ready for big things. Ready for the opportunities that are coming my way. Ready to buckle down and get the work done.
So, today (after getting frustrated looking at insurance costs) I continued to work on getting myself organized. I have so many things I want to do, I must get it all written out and figured out so I get out of this "overwhelm" that I feel. I have some paintings to complete and one ornament (I only painted two this year because I didn't advertise)...then I am completely open and ready for new jobs. I hope to finish all of these before the end of the year. The paintings on my plate have been sitting there for a while (that ornament as well) so it's time. I am feeling the push. Thankfully we are in one location for a while now so I can actually get my paints out and not have to pack up over and over again. Not that that is any sort of excuse...but it is one that I have been using and it is time for a change.
Day 55 was our Miami trip - Day 56 we simply stayed at Jordan's dad's house. Spending time with family (well, he spent time with his dad and I graded things for iSucceed). His little brother wrote us some really nice notes (he's 8) before we left. He's a sweet kid. I got to help him with his vocabulary. But, I had to get a lot of grading done because my students apparently used Thanksgiving break to try to get caught up. I don't particularly like computer work...but it is a means to an end (and a paycheck).
Day 57 (Thursday) brought us home. We were worn out and didn't do much once we got home. We really needed to go get groceries but didn't even feel up to that. Which meant that we had cereal or oatmeal for breakfast on day 58...which resulted in a blood sugar crash for me. That's no fun at all. Thankfully, we had just gotten back from the grocery store and there was food to help bring it up. Just proof that the foods we've been eating lately are not working for my body. Anyway, there really was nothing too exciting to report for Thursday or Friday.
One thing to note, the drivers down here are ridiculous. They weave in and out of traffic - we had a few close calls because they just come over in your lane - sometimes before they are fully past you. I'm grateful we made the whole drive without an incident. They also drive very fast...oh, and the use of signals is not common. We're getting used to it but I definitely don't advise driving in FL if you are tired.
On day 58 - besides going to get groceries, I painted a bit. I also began looking at insurance since the open enrollment closes next week. Talk about frustrating. Holy cow - costs are ridiculous. I tried to look again today - day 59 - but got super frustrated because of how expensive it is (and my mom texted to say that the IRS sent a very large bill for something that I already paid with the house sale - so hello stress and frustration). I finally messaged a friend in the insurance business because my time is better spent on my work - not trying to find insurance. Hopefully she'll be able to find me something that I am willing to pay.
This life is constantly throwing things in our paths that challenge us...things that push our buttons...things that make us face our fears. I am working on releasing those fears...and worries...all of mine are almost always based around finances because I grew up in the mindset that there isn't enough. But there is. There is abundance available for each of us. What we want, wants us. I know that I was given this gift, and this push to hit the road, for a reason. I know that there are people who love my art and the right people and opportunities will come to me. No, I'm not going to just sit around and wait...I'll be posting, creating marketing, connecting with people...getting out there and showing my work. I am open to the amazing opportunities that are on their way. Because I have gifts that the world needs. I am figuring out the best ways to use that gift so that I can impact the most lives possible.
For now, I will continue to blog - I'll start drawing live again with both hands (although I haven't used both hands at the same time for a little while so we shall see how it goes) and I will continue to market on FB, IG and other social media platforms. I will do what I know, and be open to opportunities known and unknown, expected and unexpected. I will paint, because I'm good at it. I will inspire. And now that we are not moving about, I will get it done. No more excuses. It is time to live differently.
It is time to make the changes necessary to make the big impact I came here to make.
So, if I am a bit spastic...just know that I am doing what I am feeling led to do. Ha ha. I might be all over the place...but I have a lot of things that I want to do - things that I feel led to do.
I hope you will follow your heart, follow those promptings, GO when you feel prompted to go. Do the things. Be the thing. Just BE.
Love you all. Have a beautiful day. Tomorrow makes SIXTY days on the road. Crazy. I haven't seen my baby girl in 60 days. That makes me sad. This year is the first year we haven't gone to the Boise Christmas Show. That Santa there is the same Santa that was there when I was a toddler - he's the REAL Santa.🙂 I am missing that. Big time. It's weird that this is my life. But it is exciting and I am doing things that others hardly ever have the courage to do...inspiring the masses along the way.
Time flies when you're having fun!
I know, cliche, but geeze louise... how is it December already? I have totally lost track of days. We've been on the go for a while. Lazy days aren't a part of our existence.
The end of day 46 had us driving to Orlando so that we could go to Universal Studios with my mom, brother and his family on days 47 and 48. We had a lot of fun but it was smaller than I expected...I guess smaller isn't accurate, there were fewer roller coasters than I expected. Most of the rides are simulation machines now. So there's a lot of audio and visual stimulation combined with movement. They're fun but definitely not the same experience as a roller coaster. However, when we finally DID go on a big one, I was dizzy for quite some time after. 😂 Definitely not as young as I once was.
We met some new friends from Puerto Rico and Dominican Republic when we arrived in Orlando. They were so entertaining, I had to strike up a conversation and connect with them on social media. My "friends list" on FB is getting quite full... I'll have to start sending people to IG I guess since all other pages are so rigidly watched by the FB algorithms. Sorry, my train went off the track a bit. 😁 Back to our new friends... they had us rolling in laughter. I look forward to seeing them again someday, now we have a place to visit in Puerto Rico!
We headed back to Jacksonville after our day at the park because Wednesday we had to vacate our spot.
Day 49, took us to Fort Myers to our longest stay so far. This is the first time I'll be in a space long enough to get mail. But first, another RV adventure in Jacksonville. Involving shit again. Thankfully it still hasn't gotten me. But, the tube fell off the rack as the black tank was emptying. I go to put it back up and somehow the connection just POPS loose. I holler to Jordan (that's my VIP - my adventure partner - my chef 😁) and say "look out! The connection came loose and it's coming your way." He was standing on the other side of the trailer ... downhill from the spill and the excrement was flowing that way. Thankfully, my first reaction was to close the tank so not very much spilled...AND, thankfully, most of it had already emptied. It was also very sandy (remember the sinking problem mentioned in the previous post).
And that, my friends, is why you never walk barefoot in an RV campsite. Gross.
We made it to Fort Myers though. A few odd things - the guy who tried to direct me when backing in was terrible ... I would've done better if he hadn't tried to help because what he was trying to get us to do made no sense with the size of my rig (our spot is a pull through but the location of electrical boxes - trees etc. made it interesting to get in). Anyway, we got in... only to find our electrical cord wouldn't reach their box. So we plugged into the site next to us. No one is there... so why not?
Then began their phone calls... "you're plugged into the wrong site." Yeah, I know, but we couldn't reach the other and haven't had time to get an extension cord (which, of course, costs $50). We rolled in fairly late and were exhausted. The next morning was Thanksgiving... and we had another drive ahead of us. Back north to my brother's in Lakeland. We left after getting a few things done... but no extension cord because we didn't think stores would be open. We'd deal with it when we got back.
Thanksgiving dinner was nice. Actually jumped on the trampoline with the kids 😂 Then day 51 had us up early (5am) to go swim with manatees. A little experience my brother set up.
We got our wet suits - I was the first in mine. Then a short boat ride from Crystal River. A few rules of what's allowed and what's not ... how to make yourself more attractive to manatees. All that fun stuff. I was the first in the water. It was a bit cold - it took my breath away.
I don't remember ever snorkeling before so I held on to the ladder for a bit, getting accustomed to having my face in the water. Jordan joined me and off we swam. Immediately we had a manatee friend. It came right up to my face. It really was an awesome experience. It rolled over so Jordan could touch it's belly. We got to hang out with it for a while before my brother's kids made their way over - and the manatee swam away.
But we all eventually got to see them. I think the kids got to touch them as well. Mom and my sister-in-law didn't touch them. They were gentle giants. If I get the chance, I'll do that again someday. It was a peaceful experience for sure! We spent about an hour and a half in the water. I started shivering, and couldn't get warm even by swimming around so I knew it was time for me to get out. It took a while to warm up again. The kids and I stood in front of the heater on the boat, our wet suits steaming. But I couldn't stop shivering until our captain (Jordan and I were on our own boat) gave me some hot chocolate and I got out of my wet suit.
We had a delicious lunch before heading back south. Arriving at our home around 5 in the evening Friday. I stopped by the office to figure things out... they were closed already.
Went by again on Saturday. Closed. We want to figure out the mail situation so we can tell people our address. Guess we'll try again Monday - the office hour sign had Saturday and Sunday marked off.
We decided to check out Fort Myers beach. It was really cool, restaurants - shops - bars. We spent a few hours on the beach then stuck around for live music. They played cover songs my mom would've loved... wasn't our cup of tea so we walked farther. Then, we ... well I ... sang karaoke. We had a blast, besides some drunk dude making passes at me. He was a bit out of control. People, if your friends have to apologize for your behavior, it's time to make a change. His friends thanked Jordan for his patience. Jordan was ready to defend me if need be... but I shut the guy down. I honestly thought that guy was into guys at first... that was the only reason I talked to him to begin with. Guess I'll have to be more careful. 🤦
Anyway, besides the obnoxious drunkard, we had a wonderful time! Sunday was a day of rest and a little bit of painting on the deck. But, as I was out emptying tanks, the guy who was terrible at directions pulls up in his cart and says "we've tried to call you for three days." My reply, "yeah and I've tried to go into the office every day but you've been closed." He proceeded to tell me what the message already said. He wasn't pleasant. Perhaps I want either because I'm pissed I'll have to spend another $50 on a cord. He says the office is open today. We go down to the office. The woman is not friendly either. Wtf? I ask Jordan if I'm being rude, he says no. He'd tell me if I was. So weird. They certainly aren't making me feel welcome.
Yesterday, Monday, we drove to Parkland to visit Jordan's dad. I worked (grading and what not for iSucceed) as Jordan drove. That works out really well. It's nice to have someone here with me. Someone who SEES me. Guys reading this... tell your gal she's beautiful. She may say you don't have to say it, but damn it feels good to hear it. My ex rarely - if ever, said it (honestly, I don't remember him saying more than "you look nice"). All I ever wanted was someone to express their thoughts - to talk to me - to SEE me. Someone who didn't want me to change. Someone who didn't expect me to do things their way. It seems I've found him. My heart is so happy. My soul is so happy. We have a dynamic that I don't even understand. It is truly magical.
I hope that you can find the magic in your life - in your relationships. Afterall, this life is short - choose love. Choose happiness. Don't stay in something because you're expected to. Life is too short for that bullshit. We were not made to be miserable.
We're going to Miami today so I better get moving. Love you all! Have a beautiful day!
I had a dream that I was traveling all over the world. In less than 6 months, I sold almost everything I own...bought a Toy Hauler (the "garage" is my art studio) and am now living wherever, whenever...just me, my art, and my cats.