May 27th, 2020

Days 230 - 231

Watching the trees over the past few weeks (I am obsessed with trees) this Catalpa in "our" back yard is amazing. It went from no leaves to these giant leaves (and it isn't finished growing) in just a few weeks.

If only we could be like trees. Shedding all the old, with a rush of wind. Releasing the things that cause decay and restrain our growth. Then spring new, crisp, clean, clear ... no expectations except that the sun will shine and we will get the sustenance we need to survive.

I've already had TWO meltdowns this week. Triggered by the past. Tears streaming. I'm hoping that I've dropped the last of those leaves. Perhaps now I have room for the new growth.

It gets frustrating and my poor VIP - Jordan - has to help bring me back to earth - back to what's important ... which is this moment, right now.

It's easy to let our past influence our present BUT if you've made the changes necessary - you've dropped the decaying leaves that would suck the life out of you if you hold on to them- you can move forward with the lessons learned. Release the pain. You don't have to carry it anymore. Release the frustration.

Feel. Process. Release.

The release is what I must not have completed. Hoping I have now. I honestly have nothing to be sad about. My life is amazing. I get to share my space with someone who loves me and SEES me. I have everything I need... food on the table, a roof over my head, money and time to do the things my heart desires and love.

THAT is what I want to focus on. Not the bullshit from the past. I choose to grow.

Each day is a chance for new growth. Will you choose to grow or are you going to hold on to the decay?

I hope you'll grow with me. Much love and light to you! Growth isn't always easy, but it is SO worth it.